My Reindeer Ears

Our annual Z Indoor Christmas Caroling party was last Saturday night and fun was had by (almost) all.  One of the stellar moments of this special evening was when Miss Brenna Lockaby, age eight, brought down the the house with her spontaneous a Capella rendition of Pat-a-Pan, garnering thunderous applause as well as rave reviews from her audience.  (Jack and I immediately scrapped our plan to sing a duet of Silent Night in German...) 

For the first time ever, there was a dark underbelly to our (normally) joyous celebration.  For decades I have worn the same pair of reindeer antlers to this evening of caroling.  They are classic and classy and include dainty golden bells suspended from a beautiful red satin bow.  This year, however, my daughter, Captain of the Fashion Police, felt I should upgrade and spring for a new pair.  Although I looked, the new crop of antlers available for purchase were lacking in quality construction as well as in bells.  My old pair are nothing if not gorgeous, but I chose not to wear them anyway.

Midway through the event, Jerry had occasion to go into our bedroom and saw the lonely antlers hanging in the closet.  He must have felt sorry for them because the next thing I knew, I was wearing my reindeer antlers again.  God's in his heaven, all's right with the world. 



Did this woman steal my antlers?

Time elapsed and a friend (well, I thought she was a friend...) plucked them from my head and onto hers.  That's the last I saw of my beloved antique antlers.  Did my (former) friend spirit them off?  Did someone else take them from her?  Were my daughters involved?   

Whoever has stolen my reindeer antlers:  listen up!  Put them in a brown paper bag and leave them at my front door by Friday.  No questions will be asked and, if you follow these instructions, no police need to be involved.

Merry Christmas to everyone (else.)

Tempting Fate

You know when you're a kid how you think the whole world revolves around you?  You use your mind to dissolve the clouds.  You change the color of the stoplight with a single glance.  You wish that your friend would call and then she does  - right then, at that very moment.  You think that the powers of your mind are vast and infinite. 

Zoomer Junior

Then you grow up.  You realize that maybe some things are beyond your control.  Maybe Uncle Ned had that heart attack, not because you forgot to remember him in your prayers, but because his arteries were full of gunk from eating donuts, BLTs and swilling beer his entire life.  Maybe his addiction to biggie fries was more of a factor in his illness than you were.

Well, my last post was about my husband the NASCAR driver then last night, for the first time in years, he was stopped by the police and presented with a speeding ticket.  He blames me for this.  According to him, I wrote this article and caused this to happen.  Tempting fate, I think is the technical term.


So then, once and for all, does the world revolve around me or not?




P.S.  Jerry's new nickname is "Zoomer."